Catch a Glimpse of Sunlight
by Razgriz Ace
Summary: "Sunlight pours through the loft's windows. A warm and pleasant spring day. It's the second time she's dying under the nicest weather with Richard Castle by her side." A little continuation for 8x22 before the time jump.


A/N: I know I'm not being terribly original here, but like most of us, I needed to work some things out with the disappointing series finale. This takes place right before the time jump on Crossfire. I'm marking it complete for now, but I may add a couple other post finale one-shots/vignettes. We'll see where they take me. :)

Disclaimer: If I owned them they wouldn't have been in this mess.

* * *

It hurts. Hurts far worse than Kate remembers. Shock must have been her friend last time, easing the pain as her body shut down.

This time every ounce of her is on fire. But she uses it. Allows it to fuel her, focus her.

Her main concern is Rick. Blood bubbles from the wound in his chest and his eyes are still wide, shock and fear etched in them. He wheezes hard, struggles for air, then coughs blood. There's a good chance his lung has collapsed. She feels the warmth pooling at her side as her own blood seeps out.

With great effort, she pulls her hand free from his and rolls, slides her fingers over his chest and plugs them into his wound. The fact that he makes no noise of pain alarms her, but then she feels his hand fall heavily over hers. It's not much but maybe it will stem his bleeding.

His eyes lock on hers and soften. Her stomach vanishes. He's starting to give up. The way he's looking at her is resigned but so full of love, filled with the words he'd say if he could.

 _At least we go out together_.

 _I love you._

Tears burn in her eyes, blur the world further. The hot liquid rolls down her cheeks. It hurts more than than the hole in her side. Dying could not be worse than watching Richard Castle's perpetual optimism finally run out.

Guilt and shame and a million other feelings rip through her as she shakes her head at him. Black is edging in on the corners of her vision and she knows it is not long before she passes out, before she and her husband bleed to death on their kitchen floor. She rips her gaze from his trying to think. God everything hurts so much. Everything hurts, and Castle can't move, but she has to do _something_. No one will ever be able to say that Kate Beckett went down without a fight.

Her next idea is to stand and her attempt is a spectacular failure. She can barely lift her head, doesn't even make it into a sitting position before she collapses. Anyone watching probably wouldn't have even guessed she was trying to get up, would think she was just convulsing. Unfortunately, there is no one watching. No one to save them this time. Her arms are getting weak and whatever pressure she was able to apply to her side and Rick's chest is fading.

Minutes or hours have passed, she's not sure. Minutes probably, because they're still alive.

She tries to yell, but can't find the air to do it. Her heart is pounding in mounting panic, and she tries to calm down, tries to keep breathing. In and out. In and out. A simple exercise Dr. Burke taught her to protect her from her own mind. She'll be dead a lot faster if her blood keeps pumping that quickly.

She'll never be able to get back to the bedroom to get to their phones. The trip to their computers in the office is just as long. Caleb must have disabled their security system so even if she could find it in her to get to the keypad, hitting the button wouldn't do any good. Her attempt to call for help nearly drains everything she has left, but the sound is weak, could never have carried outside the apartment. Her head swirls and she fights to keep completing thoughts, to keep holding onto hope.

Her eyes meet Rick's again and his fingers squeeze around hers. Even in these last moments he's trying to comfort her, and she's suddenly hoping beyond reason that there's an afterlife she can spend with him. She's freezing now, and the pain is starting to subside. Neither of those are good signs. Still, as she feels the floor start to swallow her, as she begins to let herself sink away, she thinks death won't be too bad if he's on the other side with her. The only thing she's ever been afraid of is being without him.

Sunlight pours through the loft's windows. A warm and pleasant spring day. It's the second time she's dying under the nicest weather with Richard Castle by her side.

Kate's had enough experience with trauma to know the brain does funny things to protect itself. Listening to her husband's gasps for breath, she doesn't lose herself in regrets and all the things that could have been. Those thoughts are too complicated and too infinite for her fading mind to deal with. Oddly enough, if this is how they end, if this is where she and Rick Castle were always supposed to end up, she only wishes that they had been able to have breakfast before being murdered.

She really does love watching him cook for her. She imagines him burning the eggs after she distracts him, and the two of them forgoing food all together in lieu of making love. They'd have shared toast and a final coffee afterwards, and it would have been nice. He'd just replaced the machine for one with some new feature, because God forbid one of his gadgets wasn't the newest and most expensive available.

The thought tumbles in her head pushing her down underneath it.

 _Suddenly she's sitting at the island in her bathrobe. Castle's leaning against the counter in his boxers, his hair sticking up in odd places from where she had her hands in it. She glances around, suddenly startled, but just as quickly she forgets what was upsetting and settles on the stool._

 _Castle claps his hands and the coffee maker starts pouring into her mug. He bounces in glee at the automation._

 _"Castle, we didn't need this!"_

 _"Of course we did. Compatibility is key. You and I of all people should appreciate compatibility, Kate."_

 _He saunters over with the perfectly made coffee, takes a sip before passing it to her._

 _"I do appreciate it," she says as she inhales the scent, lets it wrap around her. She leans up and draws him down for a slow coffee flavored kiss. "I just don't see what it has to do with anything."_

 _Castle leans back, his eyes full of mischief, a secret he's holding on to. "It has to do with everything Kate."_

 _"Compatibility does?"_

 _"Yes."_

 _"Why?"_

 _He grows serious. No longer playful lover, but her theory building partner. For some reason it unnerves her._

 _"You know."_

 _"We're perfectly compatible. Ying and yang. Your words," she says carefully._

 _He softens. "Not our compatibility. We're perfect," he says, giving her another quick kiss. He glances back to the coffee maker then gives her a meaningful look. "Come on, Beckett."_

 _She was so confused. Coffee maker. Compatibility. Compatible with what?_

 _Her center of gravity is suddenly yanked back and she feels herself start to fall._

Reality smashes back down around. Her eyes fire open. Understanding rippling through her. It's an utter Hail Mary, but -

"Linus!" She calls with all that she can muster, all that's left in her. She hears the soft sound of the system waking up, the gentle whirl of the computer fan.

"Good morning, Kate," the AI voice responds. "How can I assist you?"

Adrenaline jolts through her, brings her a modicum of strength and she lifts her head in the direction of the little machine, suddenly finding her voice. "Call 9-1-1." She manages. "Rick and I-" she gasps, as pain causes all her muscles and throat to seize. She forces air into her lungs. Tries again. "Officers down," she finishes weakly.

"Dialing 9-1-1."

She listens as the computer connects to dispatch and gives their names, location and somehow even her rank and badge number. If they survive, she swears on everything in the universe that she'll never make fun of Castle and his electronics again. When the operator asks for the state of the victims, Linus defers to Kate.

"Bad," she grits out, "We...we're shot...it's bad."

"Hang in there Captain Beckett. Help is on the way," the 911 operator says, her voice calming.

Instantly Kate hears sirens in the distance.

The operator tries to ask a few more questions, but Kate can't answer. Everything is falling away again.

Rick's eyes are slipping closed and open again slowly. Even though she knows unconsciousness is about to take them both she shakes her head at him one more time.

In the end the best you can hope for is to find a place to make your stand. And if you're very lucky, you find someone to stand with you.

"Stay...You stay..." she manages before trailing off. "Love..."

It's a only partial and twisted echo of his words from that day in the cemetery, but she can see the recognition on his face, the ignition behind his eyes.

This isn't a stand for truth or justice. This moment is not about killers, or spies, or conspiracies. Not about demons, regrets, or could have beens.

Castle moves his head in what she takes as a nod and his face shifts to determination. Kate's certain then. They won't end here. This isn't the last page of their story.

They're making a stand for each other.

Because it's about love.

It always has been.

* * *

 _Everything is dark_  
 _It's more than you can take_  
 _But you catch a glimpse of sunlight_  
 _Shining, shining down on your face_

 _-Andrew Belle, In My Veins_

* * *

Let me know what you thought. :)


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